So I caved. I went back. But really…I should have done this a long time ago. After getting on the scale, it’s been determined that I have actually gotten back up to my miserable pre-breakup weight of two and half years ago. Yes, I lost it all post-breakup and kept it off for a good chunk of my single year…but WHAM, as soon as I am happy and in a stable relationship, it all came back with a vengeance. It’s been a slow process…which in turn is what killed me I guess because I didn’t notice it. Vero says she cant see it; that I look the same as I did the day she met me (and hated me) but I look at pictures of that summer and LOVE how I look, and then I look at pictures from this summer and only love the ones that I am hiding from bad angles.
Regardless…I am taking a positive step for my future. Yes, I want another baby…but E’s ‘boy’ is going to have to wait for me to be happy with my body only to turn around and wreck it (oh the irony) At first I thought it was a smart idea to get pregnant BEFORE I lost the weight…but then realized that it would only depress me more to see the scale moving higher than it already has. I think it’s just a mental thing. I could handle losing weight, then gaining it all back with pregnancy….I don’t think I could handle JUST gaining weight with a pregnancy and having to lose THAT, as well as the extra weight I still need to lose now. Make sense? Meh, who knows what will happen. Jenny Craig has promised to ‘freeze’ my account if I do get pregnant, and re-start when I am ready to lose the baby weight. Not that that’s the route I want to take, but the option is there nonetheless.
So, they have some new food. The menu still has a lot of the usual ‘staples’ that I liked, but it was nice to see some more variety. Just last night I had mesquite chicken with roasted potatoes and broccoli florets, and it was delish! The portions are small granted, but I am eating 5 times a day as opposed to the two quick meals I have been eating and the rushed snack after a pinner *giggle*. I am really thinking that this little ‘bug’ I thought I had is just my poor eating habits…because today I feel great! I am not hungry, I am drinking more water, and I am eating less calories. I am on a 1200 calorie-a-day diet, and I can supplement with any kind of vegetable if I am not getting enough. Thankfully I love me some veggies, so I should be fine. I had no problems sticking to the diet years ago…that I don’t foresee any issues this time around.
My goal? 28lbs in 90 days which equals to a little over 2 pounds a week. This falls into the “healthy” weight loss category…so anything short of someone stuffing whipped cream down my throat for weeks straight, I should be good to go!
Totally random…but it smells like shit here in my office all of sudden…like a dog took an actually shit, or someone puked. *off to investigate before I puke*
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