I am kinda in the dumps this week, and its not always easy to pin point exactly why that is. There are a few things going on that I guess could be whine-till-you-piss-someone-off worthy, but in general most things are pretty awesome.
Actually, I really should be shouting off the rooftops because Ryder slept through the night last night, but that’s a whole other blog post about sleep deprivation and my recent desire to move outdoors. Maybe I’ll get to that one another day.
The one thing that’s really bothering me the most right now is friendships. It’s a complex thing, this whole idea of friendships, and it’s taken the dissolution of one for me to really evaluate the differences we all place, and importance, on our own relationships.
People are drawn together first by personality, and second by compatibility. At least in my experience and observations. We tend to migrate to, and develop relationships with, people that we enjoy to be around. Pretty simple stuff, no? We then foster longer lasting relationships with those that, once we get to know them better, we find to be somewhat similar to ourselves. Generally speaking, of course. On the flip side, the importance and the expectations we place on our friendships vary so drastically, and is usually the other major factor in defining your close and not-so-close relationships.
It’s natural. It’s normal. But it doesn’t make the hurt go away when those relationships DON’T work because one or both decide they just aren’t compatible, or in other words, the importance to each other differs.
I haven’t lost anyone, for that I am grateful, but I have been witness to the failure of one and in no small terms, it has broken my heart. I have probably done and said the wrong things to fight for it to stay together, but I make no apologies for it because I have done so with nothing but love and respect.
Hey, we all grow up, move on, and this situation will one day be a moment of the past. But for now, it will remain a tug on my heart strings and something I will continue to hope for resolution. I might be naïve, but the glass is ALWAYS half full with me.
Especially if it’s red wine. Care to join me?
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