Happy Tuesday, now get out of my fucking way

Ya, so I am of the female gender... but I am so totally fucking awesome that I do not include myself in the category of fucking crazy women drivers.

It's remarkable how many of these vagina-toting human beings are allowed to operate heavy machinery on our tax-paid roads. I feel, as an upstanding citizen who pays her taxes (and then some, the Government gets a tax-free loan from me all year that I don't see repaid until April!) that I should have some say in who they hand over that laminated piece of photo ID over too.

I don't know HOW, I just know I WANT it. That power sure would be incredible to have. You know, just to be able to walk into one of those licensing offices, smile, and decide who passes and who doesn't, BECAUSE I CAN.

I rarely have a stress-free drive to OR from work because of these breast-carrying individuals who feel like they own the road. Oblivious, self-centered, and completely ignorant, they drive like they are the only thing on the road, and it doesn't matter if they want to be in your lane while you are so very clearly in it, they are going to do it because they can...even if it means you have to accommodate them without smashing your own vehicle in their fucking bumper. Your fault if you do, right?

Not unlike a semi-truck drive, actually.

You know what else these uterus-bitching fuckheads do? Check their makeup. Repeatedly. In traffic no less, so if you are sitting behind them in their soccer mom SUV's and can't see ahead of them, you are forced to screech, stop, screech, stop, because they too cannot see in front of them with their eyes firmly placed on the vanity mirror above their windshield. Stupidest invention ever.

Hey, I am a card carrying member of the bleeding vagina's, I too think I am an incredible individual. In fact, I can stretch so far as to say I am pretty fucking awesome and people want to be ME, but I do not tolerate any other estrogen filled asshole taking up any of my awesome credit because she THINKS she is awesome. You see, I know I am.

And ok, I was previously prepared to deny this at first, but I think I own the road when I am on it too... but that's cause I can, I will, and I am awesome. So (DOUBLE STANDARD ALERT!!!) the moral of this story is that I own the road, you don't now get out of my fucking way.

And yes, I think I might be PMSing today. I cannot confirm of deny. I just know I want to slam something. Hard.