Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Ain't Nuthin by a Science Thang!

My daughter has been given the task of creating a travel brochure to the planet Jupiter. Now, while I sometimes feel like everyone around me (read: my family) MUST have come from outer space, and entertaining the idea that Jupiter is probably that location is quite funny to me since it’s a made up entirely of gas and if you have ever spent more than five minutes with my husband you would surely agree that his genetic makeup is made entirely of gas, helping her with this project has quickly landed itself close to the top of my list of ten things that are SERIOUSLY stressing me out. I. Am. Not. Joking.

(#1 is my inability to put down the glass of red wine) 

Yeah, a silly grade 4 Science project is stressing me out.

She seems to be taking it all in stride though. Funny how a 9 year old can just ‘roll with it’. Probably because she thinks Mommy will figure it all out and save the day. But friends, this is why it’s stressing me out. I actually cannot understand the teacher’s notes on what the requirements are for this project. And I have a college education. What the hell happened to me?

The notes are simple enough: List out in point form the Atmosphere, Composition, Location, Zzzzzzzzz…. Yup, this is where I am lost. Wikepedia is a useful source, granted, but I start to fade on about sentence number two. And to be fair to me, when have you ever read about the atmosphere and composition of Mexico? Hawaii? Or my personal favorite, Bora Bora? This ain’t no travel brochure, yo! This is a Science Fair Project disguised as a brochure! And Science was never my ‘thang’.

So to date, I have printed out a few pretty pictures, glued them to construction paper, and left my 9 year old to fend for herself on the research part to ‘learn about the planet without Mommy doing it for you’, when really it’s only because I don’t have the faintest idea how to help her on it. I lie, whatever. It’s for her own good. I am a super awesome Mom.

Don’t hate.

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