My mother passed away yesterday.
She had a massive stroke last Friday, which we all thought she would recover from. But she didn't, and I still don't know what went wrong.
Her sudden change of status came as a surprise, like when the sky suddenly darkens and a passing shower soaks every inch of you because there's nowhere to run. Just as quickly, the sun comes back out from the behind the clouds and you're left just standing there on some random street corner. You're looking and feeling completely disheveled, unable to hide what happened to you. And when people ask, "What happened to you?" You want to reply, "What the hell do you think happened, moron? It rained."
And that's how I feel when people ask me about my Mom or how I'm doing. You know the obvious, so why are you asking? I'm in no mood for polite conversation, or, at the other end of the spectrum, a detailed explanation of weather systems. I'm angry and tired and temporarily bereft of social grace.
Maybe I'll feel it less on my skin next week, when I change out of these wet clothes. But until then, I'm just going to stand here and hope nobody notices that it rained on me last night.
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