One in a Million

I was called “One in a Million” the other day…and not in a positive way – more like “You have some serious issues”. It was laden with sarcasm and dripping with contempt so suffice to say, I was not exactly pleased with it. Interestingly enough, it came during an unpleasant conversation that really shouldn’t have been a conversation at all. Funny how things can get so awry so quickly, no?

BUT, it made me realize why these stupid crappy (journalistic license ok? Lack of better words) dramatic silly events always happen to me. When I *think* or even *know* I am right I tend to want it KNOWN and ACKNOWLEDGED and well…I can be stubborn given the right situation.

Most of you know that I have a large target on my back for teasing, ribbing, and being the brunt of jokes. I know it doesn’t come as a surprise. You know, sometimes I enjoy it (at the right time) because you only tease the one’s you love right? I know I walk into it a lot, and I know I react with makes it WAY funnier… but…I guess it’s affected me more than I care to admit because I am so sick of it…so darn sick of it…and my feelings get hurt on a daily basis with none the wiser. I have developed a thick skin so to speak which sort of leads to my constant struggle to defend myself. Regardless of what one might think: I DON’T like arguing…in fact, I HATE IT…but I know I am going to get walked all over if I don’t stand up for myself. And while cryptic – this all leads back to my original comment about being called “One in a Million”. Honestly…I know I can be stubborn unnecessarily so, and the struggle to be ‘right’ is a family trait that we ALL have.

Maybe…for just one second…consider how many time *you* have poked fun at me (You is general…directed at every one of you three loyal readers!), made me the brunt of a joke, embarrassed me with family and/or friends….then consider WHY I am the way that I am: constantly defensive, uncooperative when demanded to do something, and completely hard-assed when threatened. Seriously, every person that has ever been a part of my life for a given time, has in some way shaped me into the person that I am : directly or indirectly.

I have a lot of years of being the underdog to make up for…obviously.

While it may not excuse my argumentative side (read: defensive) it should explain it at least a little.

Sooo... I am boyfriend-less and kid-less for a week. (read: home alone)While I miss the little one immensely, I am looking forward to pain-free grocery shopping LOL. Sad, but it’s true. I might even get more than one blog entry done this week! Although – with the ancient computer I have at home…I am not sure if I can actually write there. I can’t even save pictures because I don’t have any of the programs… and with a not-so-legal copy (I am only assuming since I was told by the person who built it) of Windows I can’t download, update, or anything. Plus, it really only works half the time.

Hmm... Time for a new one?! Lol

Oh and look…another blog post all over the map. Shocking *wink*