Please accept my most sincere apology for my lack of posting. Go see Celyne for your dose of humor.... as I will be pre-disposed for the rest of today and tomorrow with a serious deadline! When all is calm on the office front, you will hear more from me.
New post is in the draft stages...so coming soon !
Tuesday, January 30, 2007
Friday, January 26, 2007
Who does that?
I would like to preface this post by saying that what you are about to read may seem unbelievable , but I am in no way making any of this up, to 'pull the wool over your eyes' so to speak. The following paragraphs are the truth, nothing but the truth, so help me goddess.
Just last night I was informed that my significant others parents are buying us a house.
Soak THAT ONE in
I have appointments TOMORROW to go looking at a few properties with his mother so we can get an idea of what we ARE both looking for. The plan is to purchase, and have us 'rent' off them till we can afford the mortgage ourselves and then it is ours. Or, if we so choose, can sell and buy our own place when we are ready. His younger brother will rent the basement suite, as the home that is purchased will have a 'mortgage helper'.
Who does that?
I, for one, am still on shock. I am even *almost* at a loss for words, and that my friends, does not happen very often. But I don't need to tell YOU that *wink*
So have you gotten off the floor yet? I am actually typing this FROM the floor because I can't get up.
Just last night I was informed that my significant others parents are buying us a house.
Soak THAT ONE in
I have appointments TOMORROW to go looking at a few properties with his mother so we can get an idea of what we ARE both looking for. The plan is to purchase, and have us 'rent' off them till we can afford the mortgage ourselves and then it is ours. Or, if we so choose, can sell and buy our own place when we are ready. His younger brother will rent the basement suite, as the home that is purchased will have a 'mortgage helper'.
Who does that?
I, for one, am still on shock. I am even *almost* at a loss for words, and that my friends, does not happen very often. But I don't need to tell YOU that *wink*
So have you gotten off the floor yet? I am actually typing this FROM the floor because I can't get up.
Thursday, January 25, 2007
An oldie but a goodie?
*Originally posted on November 23, 2006. Every so often I will be pulling some of my older posts from my other blog that I will be removing soon. This is just because I am too lazy to write something*
WOW
WOW
wow
So we had a long talk last night. Not long enough, I suppose, but I had to run off to physio. I am even more confused, lost, frustrated, hurt, lonely, torn, and humbled than I was before :( The good news about it all... Is I came out of it with a new sense of myself. I learned a few things about how I am perceived, things that I could and cannot see, but will try hard to work on. Improving yourself isn't changing for someone, its GROWING. I have a lot of growing to do I think. This is why communication is such an integral part of a relationship. It is something that sadly most take for granted. I thought that it was him, and not me, that was having so much difficulty communicating..... but you know, by taking a step back and recalling conversations, thoughts, and all of that combined, it is a two-way street in that department. I have SUCH a difficult time expressing how I really feel.... what is bothering me....and what I cant tolerate.... And apparently I tend to turn things around so they are not my fault, but someone else's, or even a combined effort. Do I do this? Do I pass the buck? Do I not accept responsibility? I pick my side, of course, so I don't see it... but to have it pointed out to me means someone does, and there is always truth (even if its just a little bit) to everything that is said. It has also been said that I am disagreeable. That perhaps I look for a fight. It hurt to have all the nasty things that have happened between my friends (sorry if I am using the "f" word...I just chose not to use EX-Friend) and I brought back up.... because to me, I felt and still feel justified in my actions and reactions. BUT, a good point was raised. Am I not happy? Am I so miserable that I have to make others that way as well?
TO me, I am happy. To me, I smile regardless whether something is bothering me. And I do this, because I try not to let stress get me down. Or so I think. Others perceive me so much differently that I see myself. Wouldn't it be great if we could step outside our bodies and just watch ourselves for a few hours, a few days, or even a few weeks. We are all judgemental in our own way, and I wonder what kind of judgements we would pass on ourselves. Would I think I was fat? Would I think I had a terrible sense of style? (Believe me, we women think ALL theses things about other women!). Would I think my voice was annoying? Silly and trivial things... but they all come down to the bottom line... how are we perceived?
Over the last year my life has taken some tumultuous twists and turns. And I think for the most part I have held my head high and tried to be the strong person that I am. I know that I am not perfect. I know that some of my actions have hurt people. I know that other peoples actions have hurt me. But, I am no better. Regardless of the words I type here.... today, yesterday, a month ago... I am the same, no better or nor worse
To those of you I have hurt, I am sorry.
To those of you that have hurt me, I am sorry as well.
We are all human beings, with thoughts, feelings, emotions, and HEARTS. And from today on, I am going to put a mighty conscious effort into realizing that I am not ONE person on this earth, but one of many million people that are here to do the same thing I am.
SURVIVE.
WOW
WOW
wow
So we had a long talk last night. Not long enough, I suppose, but I had to run off to physio. I am even more confused, lost, frustrated, hurt, lonely, torn, and humbled than I was before :( The good news about it all... Is I came out of it with a new sense of myself. I learned a few things about how I am perceived, things that I could and cannot see, but will try hard to work on. Improving yourself isn't changing for someone, its GROWING. I have a lot of growing to do I think. This is why communication is such an integral part of a relationship. It is something that sadly most take for granted. I thought that it was him, and not me, that was having so much difficulty communicating..... but you know, by taking a step back and recalling conversations, thoughts, and all of that combined, it is a two-way street in that department. I have SUCH a difficult time expressing how I really feel.... what is bothering me....and what I cant tolerate.... And apparently I tend to turn things around so they are not my fault, but someone else's, or even a combined effort. Do I do this? Do I pass the buck? Do I not accept responsibility? I pick my side, of course, so I don't see it... but to have it pointed out to me means someone does, and there is always truth (even if its just a little bit) to everything that is said. It has also been said that I am disagreeable. That perhaps I look for a fight. It hurt to have all the nasty things that have happened between my friends (sorry if I am using the "f" word...I just chose not to use EX-Friend) and I brought back up.... because to me, I felt and still feel justified in my actions and reactions. BUT, a good point was raised. Am I not happy? Am I so miserable that I have to make others that way as well?
TO me, I am happy. To me, I smile regardless whether something is bothering me. And I do this, because I try not to let stress get me down. Or so I think. Others perceive me so much differently that I see myself. Wouldn't it be great if we could step outside our bodies and just watch ourselves for a few hours, a few days, or even a few weeks. We are all judgemental in our own way, and I wonder what kind of judgements we would pass on ourselves. Would I think I was fat? Would I think I had a terrible sense of style? (Believe me, we women think ALL theses things about other women!). Would I think my voice was annoying? Silly and trivial things... but they all come down to the bottom line... how are we perceived?
Over the last year my life has taken some tumultuous twists and turns. And I think for the most part I have held my head high and tried to be the strong person that I am. I know that I am not perfect. I know that some of my actions have hurt people. I know that other peoples actions have hurt me. But, I am no better. Regardless of the words I type here.... today, yesterday, a month ago... I am the same, no better or nor worse
To those of you I have hurt, I am sorry.
To those of you that have hurt me, I am sorry as well.
We are all human beings, with thoughts, feelings, emotions, and HEARTS. And from today on, I am going to put a mighty conscious effort into realizing that I am not ONE person on this earth, but one of many million people that are here to do the same thing I am.
SURVIVE.
Tuesday, January 23, 2007
Cheeky Monkey
Actually, that title means nothing. It just came to me and I liked how it sounded. Plus, I really have no clue what I am going to write about until I am halfway through the first paragraph anyways. I mean seriously...who actually PLANS what they are going to write? pffftt. I laugh at you.
What does rain make you feel? Think about it for a second. And make it a long second...go make a sandwich, fill up your water glass, take a bathroom break... (but come back!)...
Have you ever noticed that on a rainy day, even the most cheerful of persons is *slightly* (I use that word lightly) LESS cheerful than normal? That man in traffic who would normally smile and wave you in to merge slams on the gas to block you? Or that coffee clerk who greets you every morning before she hands you your latte shoves the mug at you causing scalding milk to burn your wrist?
And that bitch in your office whom is NEVER cheerful is even more bitchy?
It's true, rain is depressing, *SHOCKING I know* (please note my sarcasm, or you're just stupid) and I am going to lose my mind if it doesn't hightail it out of here soon.
Because that office bitch is driving me absolutely BANANAS.
In all seriousness, she really isn't a bad person. In fact, she can be quite sweet. And it is those days I look forward to. We have lunch together, we gossip together about the office psycho (who you may remember in past episodes "that crazy psycho bitch" and "Social Services comes a knockin' "), we laugh because she can be hilarious, we even talk about her home renovations (Sadly Ikea is NOT the way to go, just an FYI) She has absolutely no clue that she IS a bitch. She cannot seem to get why people don't like her. She will sit there looking perplexed and ask me what she has done to have this label. And I can't tell her. Mostly, lets be honest, because I am a chicken shit, but also because it's not my place to speak for everyone else (I am sticking with that one!) *I should also mention here that it really has nothing to do with the rain, I am just using it as an excuse because it's making ME grumpy*. Unfortunately, she has the job title of 'Office Controller' which in office-speak means Office Bitch Who Does Everything Without Any Recognition. Or as I like to call it : SUCKER. I think this in itself is every reason to be a bitch, just to the right people. Don't alienate the masses, we are your backbone.
Our Company has gone through a buy out recently. While this is actually good news, it is not good news for the Controller Aka: SUCKER. Her job has become increasingly demanding, stressful, and time consuming. And to add insult to injury, the people she needs to report to (and are creating all this stress) are less than helpful, are extremely persistant with their demands, and not so polite when they don't get their way. This is not a good recipe for a calm work environment (oh and look, another food reference. Is it lunch yet?).
The morale of this story is as follows:
1. Rain has nothing to do with being in a bad mood, but it DOES make a good excuse
3. The office bitch will NEVER change
4. Do not, I repeat, DO NOT make eye contact with Office Bitch on those 'bad' days
5. Keep the masses happy, they support you
6. I have no clue what I am talking about, but I am glad your reading anyways
You know, I do write a lot of mindless drivel. I'm making note of that.
What does rain make you feel? Think about it for a second. And make it a long second...go make a sandwich, fill up your water glass, take a bathroom break... (but come back!)...
Have you ever noticed that on a rainy day, even the most cheerful of persons is *slightly* (I use that word lightly) LESS cheerful than normal? That man in traffic who would normally smile and wave you in to merge slams on the gas to block you? Or that coffee clerk who greets you every morning before she hands you your latte shoves the mug at you causing scalding milk to burn your wrist?
And that bitch in your office whom is NEVER cheerful is even more bitchy?
It's true, rain is depressing, *SHOCKING I know* (please note my sarcasm, or you're just stupid) and I am going to lose my mind if it doesn't hightail it out of here soon.
Because that office bitch is driving me absolutely BANANAS.
In all seriousness, she really isn't a bad person. In fact, she can be quite sweet. And it is those days I look forward to. We have lunch together, we gossip together about the office psycho (who you may remember in past episodes "that crazy psycho bitch" and "Social Services comes a knockin' "), we laugh because she can be hilarious, we even talk about her home renovations (Sadly Ikea is NOT the way to go, just an FYI) She has absolutely no clue that she IS a bitch. She cannot seem to get why people don't like her. She will sit there looking perplexed and ask me what she has done to have this label. And I can't tell her. Mostly, lets be honest, because I am a chicken shit, but also because it's not my place to speak for everyone else (I am sticking with that one!) *I should also mention here that it really has nothing to do with the rain, I am just using it as an excuse because it's making ME grumpy*. Unfortunately, she has the job title of 'Office Controller' which in office-speak means Office Bitch Who Does Everything Without Any Recognition. Or as I like to call it : SUCKER. I think this in itself is every reason to be a bitch, just to the right people. Don't alienate the masses, we are your backbone.
Our Company has gone through a buy out recently. While this is actually good news, it is not good news for the Controller Aka: SUCKER. Her job has become increasingly demanding, stressful, and time consuming. And to add insult to injury, the people she needs to report to (and are creating all this stress) are less than helpful, are extremely persistant with their demands, and not so polite when they don't get their way. This is not a good recipe for a calm work environment (oh and look, another food reference. Is it lunch yet?).
The morale of this story is as follows:
1. Rain has nothing to do with being in a bad mood, but it DOES make a good excuse
3. The office bitch will NEVER change
4. Do not, I repeat, DO NOT make eye contact with Office Bitch on those 'bad' days
5. Keep the masses happy, they support you
6. I have no clue what I am talking about, but I am glad your reading anyways
You know, I do write a lot of mindless drivel. I'm making note of that.
Monday, January 22, 2007
Relationship Guru
*Apparantly when I type a smiley face into word, then cut and paste it here, it comes out as J. so, if you see one, know that I am smiling... inside :) *
Just recently two people whom I care a lot about decided to end their relationship and go their separate ways. I was sad to hear it. You know, not even just SAD, but actually shocked. They are both extremely intelligent individuals, which leads me to believe that this was decided with much thought and care, but it made me realize how private some people keep their lives.
Am I private? Hell no. Do I want to be? Hell yes. Can I be? Hell no.
Ahh….the pondering I do when I am bored out of my mind.
This ‘separation of ways’ if you will, got me thinking about how hard it is to leave someone you love, despite the challenges you face. It is a common misconception for one to think that the love is gone when you break up…but really, that is most often NOT the case. It is BECAUSE you love them that you have to let them go. We all deal with issues in our relationships, whether we chose to make them public, or we keep them behind closed doors.
Love DOES NOT keep us together (Captain & Tennile circa 1975) Come on, your singing it, you know you are! I am, and I can’t sing. Love may bring us together, but it doesn’t KEEP us together. Hard work, dedication, and the willingness to compromise are the ingredients FOR ME to make a relationship work, but what’s yours? Because I don’t pretend that we all deal with our relationships the same way, nor are we all successful by following the same ‘game plan’. That in itself is a recipe for disaster! (you like all my food references lol)
I am in no way a relationship expert, but I can say that from my list of failed ones (quite short actually!) I have learned so much about myself; my fears, my insecurities, and my weaknesses. If you haven’t learned anything from YOUR relationships, you haven’t been listening J
All in all, I want to say good luck to those two people that have chosen separate paths. I care about BOTH of you, and think you are BOTH great people. You may not deserve each other, but you both deserve the best J
Just recently two people whom I care a lot about decided to end their relationship and go their separate ways. I was sad to hear it. You know, not even just SAD, but actually shocked. They are both extremely intelligent individuals, which leads me to believe that this was decided with much thought and care, but it made me realize how private some people keep their lives.
Am I private? Hell no. Do I want to be? Hell yes. Can I be? Hell no.
Ahh….the pondering I do when I am bored out of my mind.
This ‘separation of ways’ if you will, got me thinking about how hard it is to leave someone you love, despite the challenges you face. It is a common misconception for one to think that the love is gone when you break up…but really, that is most often NOT the case. It is BECAUSE you love them that you have to let them go. We all deal with issues in our relationships, whether we chose to make them public, or we keep them behind closed doors.
Love DOES NOT keep us together (Captain & Tennile circa 1975) Come on, your singing it, you know you are! I am, and I can’t sing. Love may bring us together, but it doesn’t KEEP us together. Hard work, dedication, and the willingness to compromise are the ingredients FOR ME to make a relationship work, but what’s yours? Because I don’t pretend that we all deal with our relationships the same way, nor are we all successful by following the same ‘game plan’. That in itself is a recipe for disaster! (you like all my food references lol)
I am in no way a relationship expert, but I can say that from my list of failed ones (quite short actually!) I have learned so much about myself; my fears, my insecurities, and my weaknesses. If you haven’t learned anything from YOUR relationships, you haven’t been listening J
All in all, I want to say good luck to those two people that have chosen separate paths. I care about BOTH of you, and think you are BOTH great people. You may not deserve each other, but you both deserve the best J
Friday, January 19, 2007
A different kind of love letter
Dear Bullet,
I would like to begin this letter by first apologizing to you for my lack of attention. Sadly, you have been put aside in a bedside table for thirteen months; your existence not recognized when it very obviously should have been. For that, I am sorry.
The other day as I was lying in bed consumed with the idea of sleep yet unable to float away, I glanced over to that bedside drawer. I am not sure why I thought about you, or even what exactly I was thinking, but I slowly reached into that drawer to relieve you of your dungeon. A dungeon that I had condemned you to because of my own fears and misgivings. Thankfully, the brand new package of batteries was close by, as your power supply was emtpy. (hmm sidebar: why was that?)
I want to thank you for what you have done for me. My eyes are open, WIDE open, and I have you to thank for that. The first time, I explored you myself. Touching, caressing, all to find what I LIKED best. But the second time, I introduced you to someone very special to me, and if he were here right now, he would thank you as well. What we share together, and NOW with you, is mind numbing; something no drug could ever provide.
I will forever and always take care of you, my bullet. Please remember that, as you have taken care of me.
Sincerely in lust,
C
I would like to begin this letter by first apologizing to you for my lack of attention. Sadly, you have been put aside in a bedside table for thirteen months; your existence not recognized when it very obviously should have been. For that, I am sorry.
The other day as I was lying in bed consumed with the idea of sleep yet unable to float away, I glanced over to that bedside drawer. I am not sure why I thought about you, or even what exactly I was thinking, but I slowly reached into that drawer to relieve you of your dungeon. A dungeon that I had condemned you to because of my own fears and misgivings. Thankfully, the brand new package of batteries was close by, as your power supply was emtpy. (hmm sidebar: why was that?)
I want to thank you for what you have done for me. My eyes are open, WIDE open, and I have you to thank for that. The first time, I explored you myself. Touching, caressing, all to find what I LIKED best. But the second time, I introduced you to someone very special to me, and if he were here right now, he would thank you as well. What we share together, and NOW with you, is mind numbing; something no drug could ever provide.
I will forever and always take care of you, my bullet. Please remember that, as you have taken care of me.
Sincerely in lust,
C
Thursday, January 18, 2007
Do men 'fake'?
*Disclaimer. As do most of my posts, this one is completely fictitious and is no way related to my life or anyone whom is close to me. It is purely for entertainment value. I do not want to recieve emails from anyone asking me if my relationship is okay and would I be interesed in some counselling. Despite being thoughtful (for crazy people) I am in no need of this and am blissfully happy with my relationship and sex life. Thank you and have a pleasant day*
The age old question.
Do men "fake" ? I mean, can they?
I was thinking about this the other day, purely for my own perverse amusement while I was mindlessly staring at a blurry computer screen (blurry because I was staring at it) and listening to the buzz, beep, and whine of the fax machine.
Not exactly a thrilling day.
I would wager that about 99.99% of women have faked an orgasm at one point in their life, if not many, and not because we can (because OH WE CAN) but because there happened to be no other way to end the disasterous sex that we were having at that particular moment. Men seem to think that it is programmed into their manlihood to pound away as fast and as hard as they possibly can in order to make us cum, without realizing that the grimace on our face is there because we are in fact NOT enjoying ourselves. I still have not figured out how they cannot come to the obvious conclusion on that one, but I digress. Faking comes naturally for most women who have some kind of reign on their Keigal Muscles. If you don't know what that is, YOU need the counselling.
This brings me back to my original thought. Do men "fake"? Think about it for a second. Lets say, hypothetically of course, (please read disclaimer above) that you are in a long-term relationship and for some reason choose not to use protection. (Pull-out, TRYING to get pregnant, whatever). In this situation, is it possible for a man to fake?
I ponder.
My answer, instinctively, was no. But then I pondered some more. Sadly, I am stumped for words on how to accurately describe this withought being ...well... gross. So I truck on.... When men cum, there is fluid. And more often than not, LOTS of sticky thick fluid. And when you are not using a condom, this tends to sort of sit there for a bit, then slowly ...uummm... leak (ugh I hate that word). Now how can a man possibly fake that?
But here is why I have changed my answer from no, to maybe. What if this man, currently in the hypothetical situation above, is a little cummer? *I chose this term 'little cummer' cause it made me giggle, and well anything that makes me giggle shall be on this blog. * So what if, being a little cummer, nothing leaks? Do you feel like you've been 'faked-out' or did your long hallway of pleasure (oooo im good at this!) vacuum that liquid in a selfish urge to make you a baby? Wow, I cannot believe that sentence actually was typed by moi. I am totally NOT editing in any way!
Have I answered the quesiton?
Because I said Maybe. And that TOTALLY is an acceptable answer.
Because I said so. And I'm cool.
Now, reading this whole post back for spelling errors (for those that know me well, know that I type extremely fast and have very frequent spelling errors...some quite comical. The good news is this place has a spell check option which really makes me happy) ...(back to what I was saying)....It sounds like I am calling my main man a 'little cummer'. I have sworn to never post anything about him here and in order to protect our relationship, NOTHING here will EVER be about him, ok? Because he will get mad. Very mad. He may be cute when he's mad,(his cheeks go ever so slightly pink) but I think this time it would be different. I value my shoe collection too. I don't need them thrown out of his truck window as he is flying down the Freeway at 120 clicks with his furniture in the back. He knows where it hurts... he would go for the shoes.
The age old question.
Do men "fake" ? I mean, can they?
I was thinking about this the other day, purely for my own perverse amusement while I was mindlessly staring at a blurry computer screen (blurry because I was staring at it) and listening to the buzz, beep, and whine of the fax machine.
Not exactly a thrilling day.
I would wager that about 99.99% of women have faked an orgasm at one point in their life, if not many, and not because we can (because OH WE CAN) but because there happened to be no other way to end the disasterous sex that we were having at that particular moment. Men seem to think that it is programmed into their manlihood to pound away as fast and as hard as they possibly can in order to make us cum, without realizing that the grimace on our face is there because we are in fact NOT enjoying ourselves. I still have not figured out how they cannot come to the obvious conclusion on that one, but I digress. Faking comes naturally for most women who have some kind of reign on their Keigal Muscles. If you don't know what that is, YOU need the counselling.
This brings me back to my original thought. Do men "fake"? Think about it for a second. Lets say, hypothetically of course, (please read disclaimer above) that you are in a long-term relationship and for some reason choose not to use protection. (Pull-out, TRYING to get pregnant, whatever). In this situation, is it possible for a man to fake?
I ponder.
My answer, instinctively, was no. But then I pondered some more. Sadly, I am stumped for words on how to accurately describe this withought being ...well... gross. So I truck on.... When men cum, there is fluid. And more often than not, LOTS of sticky thick fluid. And when you are not using a condom, this tends to sort of sit there for a bit, then slowly ...uummm... leak (ugh I hate that word). Now how can a man possibly fake that?
But here is why I have changed my answer from no, to maybe. What if this man, currently in the hypothetical situation above, is a little cummer? *I chose this term 'little cummer' cause it made me giggle, and well anything that makes me giggle shall be on this blog. * So what if, being a little cummer, nothing leaks? Do you feel like you've been 'faked-out' or did your long hallway of pleasure (oooo im good at this!) vacuum that liquid in a selfish urge to make you a baby? Wow, I cannot believe that sentence actually was typed by moi. I am totally NOT editing in any way!
Have I answered the quesiton?
Because I said Maybe. And that TOTALLY is an acceptable answer.
Because I said so. And I'm cool.
Now, reading this whole post back for spelling errors (for those that know me well, know that I type extremely fast and have very frequent spelling errors...some quite comical. The good news is this place has a spell check option which really makes me happy) ...(back to what I was saying)....It sounds like I am calling my main man a 'little cummer'. I have sworn to never post anything about him here and in order to protect our relationship, NOTHING here will EVER be about him, ok? Because he will get mad. Very mad. He may be cute when he's mad,(his cheeks go ever so slightly pink) but I think this time it would be different. I value my shoe collection too. I don't need them thrown out of his truck window as he is flying down the Freeway at 120 clicks with his furniture in the back. He knows where it hurts... he would go for the shoes.
Day One
I have a blog.
Oh, not THIS one. I actually have one. But its pretty lame. I have *I think* 5 readers (whom I love dearly) but I started thinking the other day that my imagination and humor is being wasted by having this silly blog hidden (publicly!) behind my msn messenger. I sort of fancy myself an educated scholar (oh the irony) with so much to say that many of you really do, despite your best efforts, need to hear ! Seriously! I don't lie!
Some say I am funny when I don't try to be, and completely dry when I DO try. So I am going to make the conscious effort to just write what I feel, even if it ends up being paragraph after paragraph of mindless drivel and run-on sentences. If only, and ONLY, to entertain YOU, my loyal reader. And, if I happen to morph into some Sex in the City kind of character because I am sad like that, please don't tell me and just think it ok? Funny, I actually know someone like that and it really isn't funny (wow, day one and I am already making ZERO sense) so I am deathly fearful that you might think that of me! Wow, insecure much?
I drink. A lot. In fact, I might even post drunk and not edit. Please, it is meant to entertain not disgust, so don't take anything I write literal. But if you do, please think its about you because the reactions are always much more funnier than what I actually posted. And now, I guess, would be an appropriate time for my disclaimers....
1. Blogger shall not be held responsible for the things posted here. Despite possibly being true facts, I will always hide behind anonymity by not posting real names. (if you so choose)
2. Blogger will refuse all comments made in hate. Only, AND ONLY, because I am cool and people who hate are NOT cool. Plus, I am better than you
2. Blogger will always be hotter than any of my readers. Nothing more to say about that
3. If you think it's about you, it probably is. So please, comment about it.
4. Blogger reserves the right to be mean. Please read #2 about being cool...
5. Blogger shall not be held liable for slanderous comments. Because they are funny
6. Blogger will use fictitious names if you so ask for that. If you don't, be prepared for a nickname
7. Blogger loves everyone. Seriously.
There will come a time (hopefully sooner rather than later) where I will be documenting a 101 in 1001. Explanation to follow at a later date. I need to do some more reading on the subject before I pretend I know what I am talking about. It sounds empowering, and since I am cool like that, I *may* try it. No guarantees. It was mentioned in an online forum that I participate in and while it grabbed my attention and screamed "Do me! Do me!" I need some time to formulate a plan to maximize the attention I can get from it. Cause it is, and always will be, all about me. Really. The Universe DOES revolve around me. Check the encyclopedia. I dare you.
So Post one, DOWN. I have a few goodies in the bag from my other blog I may cut and paste here before shuttin 'er down. I'm not sure yet. Depends on how much time i have today to sift through mindless drivel. Because, to be honest and without shame, a lot of it IS mindless. See? I can take criticism. Sure, its from me, but criticism nonetheless. Doesn't mean YOU can do it... but still a step in the right direction of becoming a well rounded individual. And I don't mean round in the literal sense. I am still working than one out :)
Happy Thursday!
PS. Please submit all blog requests to eatmyshit@carmen101.blogspot.com
Oh, not THIS one. I actually have one. But its pretty lame. I have *I think* 5 readers (whom I love dearly) but I started thinking the other day that my imagination and humor is being wasted by having this silly blog hidden (publicly!) behind my msn messenger. I sort of fancy myself an educated scholar (oh the irony) with so much to say that many of you really do, despite your best efforts, need to hear ! Seriously! I don't lie!
Some say I am funny when I don't try to be, and completely dry when I DO try. So I am going to make the conscious effort to just write what I feel, even if it ends up being paragraph after paragraph of mindless drivel and run-on sentences. If only, and ONLY, to entertain YOU, my loyal reader. And, if I happen to morph into some Sex in the City kind of character because I am sad like that, please don't tell me and just think it ok? Funny, I actually know someone like that and it really isn't funny (wow, day one and I am already making ZERO sense) so I am deathly fearful that you might think that of me! Wow, insecure much?
I drink. A lot. In fact, I might even post drunk and not edit. Please, it is meant to entertain not disgust, so don't take anything I write literal. But if you do, please think its about you because the reactions are always much more funnier than what I actually posted. And now, I guess, would be an appropriate time for my disclaimers....
1. Blogger shall not be held responsible for the things posted here. Despite possibly being true facts, I will always hide behind anonymity by not posting real names. (if you so choose)
2. Blogger will refuse all comments made in hate. Only, AND ONLY, because I am cool and people who hate are NOT cool. Plus, I am better than you
2. Blogger will always be hotter than any of my readers. Nothing more to say about that
3. If you think it's about you, it probably is. So please, comment about it.
4. Blogger reserves the right to be mean. Please read #2 about being cool...
5. Blogger shall not be held liable for slanderous comments. Because they are funny
6. Blogger will use fictitious names if you so ask for that. If you don't, be prepared for a nickname
7. Blogger loves everyone. Seriously.
There will come a time (hopefully sooner rather than later) where I will be documenting a 101 in 1001. Explanation to follow at a later date. I need to do some more reading on the subject before I pretend I know what I am talking about. It sounds empowering, and since I am cool like that, I *may* try it. No guarantees. It was mentioned in an online forum that I participate in and while it grabbed my attention and screamed "Do me! Do me!" I need some time to formulate a plan to maximize the attention I can get from it. Cause it is, and always will be, all about me. Really. The Universe DOES revolve around me. Check the encyclopedia. I dare you.
So Post one, DOWN. I have a few goodies in the bag from my other blog I may cut and paste here before shuttin 'er down. I'm not sure yet. Depends on how much time i have today to sift through mindless drivel. Because, to be honest and without shame, a lot of it IS mindless. See? I can take criticism. Sure, its from me, but criticism nonetheless. Doesn't mean YOU can do it... but still a step in the right direction of becoming a well rounded individual. And I don't mean round in the literal sense. I am still working than one out :)
Happy Thursday!
PS. Please submit all blog requests to eatmyshit@carmen101.blogspot.com
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